 |
| Match Details |
| Round |
Round 2 |
| Opposition |
St George Linen |
| Date |
1-Jan-1996 |
| Ground |
|
| Match Summary |
| Result |
WIN on 1st innings by 4 wickets |
| Kurrajong Gypsies 1st innings |
6 wickets, 198 runs
|
| St George Linen 1st innings |
8 wickets, 185 runs
|
| Match Report |
How the mighty have fallen. Two short millenniums ago the Greek Empire embraced almost all the known world: Alexander the Great ate a dodgy vindaloo at the very gateway to Asia, while in downtown Athens the Fig Gatherering Party had just gone down in the polls to the Leather Merchants and Plato was just a twinkle in his Daddy’s eye. But it was not all plain sailing. A band of Corinthian Launderers en route to Syracuse in a leaky trireme got pissed on an urn of Theban Red, turned left at Atlantis and voyaged into the unknown. Nothing would ever have been known about these intrepid idiots if it weren’t for the discovery of the Stinkyrinchus Fragment at the back of the late Emeritus Professor Goldfardt’s record collection, amongst the early Nana Mouskouri LP’s. Apart from detailing a primitive souvlaki recipe it recounts the story of a landing in a “great southern land” of a band of “Kogrinthians” and of how they founded a city, “Kogara(h)”. Unfortunately the fragment is incomplete and ends just when it begins to describe a fabulous new cloth spun from rectal hair.
The Gypsies made several changes for their second round match against the Kogarah Hellas Bedwetters XI. “Bouncer” Bailey joined the past players after only one match while stalwarts Jackson and Ebeling added age if not experience or ability to the line-up. Hair, or lack of it, dominated the opening day’s play. The Gypsies opened with their new two-headed albino Sri Lankan Mystic Laxman Shivaramakrishnahan while the Peloponnesians replied with a batting line-up chock full of bouffanted, bryl-creamed, Boeotian buffoons. It was no contest once the skipper took himself off after four overs of leather damaging slow/mediums and let the real bowlers do the job. A good opening attack must have variety, and with the long-haired, tree-hugging cack-hander from one end and a gleaming skid-lid kid from the other, the Duran Duran XI was immediately in trouble. The Gypsies held sway for most of the day, and if they’d only held their catches as well they could have been batting by drinks. Instead, it was left up to Old Man Tap to mop up the Macedonian middle order. Using his years of experience he struck a double blow for Senior Citizens everywhere, taking two wickets with his subtle variations of length. First the special - the Moore Park Meat Pie, cunningly followed by the half tracker. It was beautiful to watch, and such a shame that none of his original fan club members could have lived long enough to see it.
The Zorba the Launderer’s XI were finally dismissed for 196 with Shanaramagiveusahan taking the bowling honours, bagging 5/48. The Cutlet and Inaction Jackson saw off some encouragingly pathetic bowling from the Delphic Dry Cleaners to be 0/22 at stumps.
Seven days later, the Gypsy openers took the field half an hour late determined to put the Stygian Starchers to the sword. They were greeted by Greeks bearing gifts and took full toll in a fine opening stand of 85. The Cutlet again threw away his wicket nearing 50 after doing all the hard work. This brought Priscilla to the crease and he immediately began to create havoc. First he ran out Jackson, citing a clash of personalities as the reason, then, unable to handle the grief, ran himself out. This brought out the best in the Gypsy middle order with the Passenger, the Venetian and Kitty all failing to take toll of an attack that read more like an Athenian Tour Guide than a bowling line-up. Only the Ancient One, Tap Colman looked at home. Fresh from an all-night video session that included; Cocoon, Cocoon II, Grumpy Old Men, and On Golden Pond he pranced about the batting crease like a sixty year-old, belting 21 off one over with a little help from the Human Bowling Ball. He finished the day 80 no, and sauntered off, leaving the would-be Olympians to contemplate one of their worst thrashings since the time a bunch of no-good, do-nothing Scythians told Philip of Macedon that they didn’t like the idea of “going Greek” at all.
It was a match when riddles became enigmas, enigmas turned into conundrums, then back into riddles again. Other riddles, because of the warm weather went on a picnic, but forgot to ask the enigmas down the street, who when they found out crossed them off their Christmas list. Questions were asked of the new-found Gypsy spirit, and the answers sometimes didn’t match the questions, but when day blended gently into night the Chateau Musgravy has rarely been drunk with such anticipation as the Assorted George & Bazouki Tuners XI contemplated an almost unprecedented start to the season.
|
|
|
| Kurrajong Gypsies 1st innings |
| Sharp, Tom |
1 |
| Gray, James |
40 |
| Fenton-Smith, Will |
0 |
| Bradley, Steve |
10 |
| Colman, Dave |
80* |
| Ohlin, Nick |
0 |
| Jackson, Paul |
28 |
| Shanahan, Jim |
10* |
|
| St George Linen 1st innings |
| Shanahan, Jim |
16 overs, 5 for 48 |
| Waters, David |
15 overs, 2 for 40 |
| Colman, Dave |
10 overs, 2 for 38 |
| Bradley, Steve |
8 overs, 1 for 35 |
| Ohlin, Nick |
3 overs, 0 for 19 |
|
|
